A Thanksgiving Fast--Mexico Part 2

Fasting is a wonderful spiritual discipline that I often do on behalf of my children or when I need clarity regarding an issue. When I arrived in town on Friday night, I realized I wasn't hungry and didn't even have a desire for a snack. After waking up Saturday morning, I still wasn't hungry. I couldn't eat for over 24 hours after coming home.

I realized I was in a reverse fast. Usually, I fast so I can be filled with Jesus and gain greater insight or understanding. This time I was already so filled that nothing else satisfied. I didn't want physical food. I felt as though I had stood in the presence of Jesus for a week and was fully saturated in Him.

As I meditated on my trip and went into the late afternoon hours of Saturday, I finally began to feel hunger pains. I was almost disappointed that I wanted physical food. I wanted to stay full of Jesus.

During this time, I was reminded of the verse that God brought to me earlier in the week. I had camped on 2 Corinthians 9:12 "This service that you perform is not only supplying the needs of God's people but is also overflowing in many expressions of thanks to God." I was so thankful that God allowed me to be a tiny part of His work and that whether I'm on a mission trip, eating lunch or driving to work, everything I do should be an expression of thanksgiving to my Lord.

My cup overfloweth and it must have been evident. Someone approached me last evening to let me know they thought I was just glowing on Sunday morning. I did feel radiant. That's what spending a week with Jesus will do. I yearn to live that way today and tomorrow. I want seek Him with all my heart.

The Travelling Word--Mexico Part 1

I just spent a week in Monterrey, Mexico serving orphans and those who have not much of anything to call their own. I immersed my heart, my soul and my mind in the experience that God called me to. I spent 4 days at 3 different orphanages and 1 day at a squatter's village where the poorest of the poor have nothing, so they scrounge through a trash dump that serves as the center of their neighborhood. God began to speak to me and move me in ways I've never experienced. Over the next few weeks, I'll share my experience, not in narrative, but in stories. Every day was packed and I saw Jesus everywhere I looked.

I'll start with the end. The day before I left for Mexico I wrote about deciding whether to bring my big, bulky Bible with me. I felt compelled and was so glad I had it along. It was open and speaking to me each morning during my quiet time and held me captive in the evenings when I was drawn to certain verses. But it wasn't until I was leaving Monterrey airport yesterday that knew the true purpose of why I needed to have it by my side.

After packing my suitcase, I laid my Bible right on top of all my dirty clothes and closed it. I knew my suitcase weighed in at close to 50 lbs. and if it goes over that weight the airline charges a large additional fee. So I wanted to be able to get right to my Bible if I needed to pull some weight and put it in my backpack. Before checking in, my suitcase needed to be inspected. The guy unzipped my bag and there lay my Bible right on top. He looked at it and then searched around the sides of my bag and then looked back at the Bible. I could tell he was really drawn to it. He picked it up and then gently laid it back down. My Bible cover has Jeremiah 29:11 on the front..."For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." The guy moved his finger under the word "Lord," paused and then ran his finger under the words "plans to prosper you." He looked up at me and said, "Is this for me?" I replied, "Yes, God has a plan for all of us." He just smiled and rezipped my suitcase.

I don't know what was going on in that man's life or why he was so captivated by my Bible and the verse on front, but God does and yesterday morning God spoke to that man in Mexico through a very well loved Bible that calls Danville, IN home.

Abandonment and Packing The Word

My devotion last night focused on truly recognizing Jesus--His appearance and voice in your life. I am captivated by this idea of being so fully sold out that I don't ever hesitate when He speaks. But I'm not there yet.

The author said, "We step right out with recognition of God in some things, then self-consideration enters our lives and down we go...If you debate for even one second when God has spoken, it is all over for you...It is only through abandonment of yourself and your circumstances that you will recognize Him." I want to experience that as a natural part of my life. That is my goal. I pray that as I serve Him in Mexico I will move one step closer.

On another note, I have debated all week whether to take my Bible I read from daily to Mexico. It is big and bulky. It weighs in at almost 4 lbs. So instead I packed a thin NT in my backpack and a more compact complete Bible in my suitcase. They both travel easier. But I couldn't get it out of my mind that I wanted my regular Bible with me...it kept bugging me. Finally, today, I thought, "Why am I bothered about the extra weight? It's God's Word and it's my most treasured possession." I want it with me. Period. So I it packed in my suitcase. I feel so much better knowing it will be by my side all week.

Heart Prep

I’ve spent a lot of time lately preparing my heart. It is a process that I’ve often overlooked in my Walk. When I’m confident in God’s leading, I have a tendency to just plow ahead…jumping into whatever He has in mind with both feet. Easing into the pool little by little has never been my style. But I’m learning.

Two weeks ago, I dropped Derek off for Basic training. He was headed to Ft. Benning, GA. He would be gone for 4-5 months. That thought sent me into a tailspin. He is so precious to me and we have such a close relationship that I was trying to figure out how to adjust. I needed to be prepped for not only for the day of his departure, but his absence all summer.

And this Saturday, I head to Monterrey, Mexico to work with orphans for a week. I had given a book to a dear friend for Christmas. After reading it, she gave it back to me to read and be inspired. I was blown away by the author’s story of obedience and all the God was doing as a result of the orphan ministry she started. I knew without a doubt, God was calling me to go and be a part of this. But, again, I needed to be quiet before my Lord so He could speak to me and prepare me for this journey.

So He’s been preparing me to walk down the paths He has laid before me. I was drawn to Jeremiah 18:4 "But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him." No matter the road I’m called to take, I must be molded and shaped to become more like Him. It is through this process I can be a most effective instrument.

I have spent much time reflecting on all that God has taught me in the past, all the grace and mercy that He has shown me and the joy that comes as a result of loving Him each day. Yes, I will continue to prepare myself for the mission He has for me in this life. At the moment, my heart is full. I have a peace that this world can never give, nor take away.

I know my heart is full when I’m smiling so big on the inside that I can’t control myself. I spent 3 days last week with friends camping at Holiday World enjoying the rides and good conversations. I was thinking how goofy I must have looked to everyone, because I was constantly dancing. I danced at the park, at breakfast and at the gas station late at night. I couldn’t help myself. I was dancing with joy from the blessings that my Lord has poured down on little ol’ me.

Peace

On a regular basis, I experience God’s peace that truly transcends all understanding. It is the most underrated character of God. Last week was difficult for me. I felt the looming departure of Derek to Basic training and a variety other emotions that had all descended upon me. But in the midst of it all, I simply felt calm. I ached, but I stood firm. I stood on the very foundation that Christ, Himself has laid for me. He has given me a tremendous reservoir of faithfulness and goodness to tap. And He has never, ever let me down. This is all the encouragement I need when dark clouds appear.

Derek has been gone now for three days. His number has stopped popping up on my phone, his chair is empty at the table and his truck stays put in the garage. But I’m coping surprisingly well. God has put me in a very good place. Derek was feeling anxiety about entering the unknown and confessed that he cried on the plane trip down to the base. I told him I wanted him to keep one thing in mind—he was on God’s mission first and foremost before the Army’s. I told him if he could truly wrap his head around that, then he would know where he would be getting his strength and courage. It would be the perspective he needed in order to serve as the godly young man that he has become.

I am at peace. I’ve turned Derek over to God and know the Creator of the universe is far more capable than I am of taking care of him. I pray with great confidence and know my best Friend will see Derek through the next four months.